“Things were going so well,” my friend, a successful entrepreneur, said as he leaned forward, his head crashing dramatically into his hands. “I just don’t know what women want…”
He’s not stupid and he’s not alone. Men all over the world ask the same question. They are generally met by collective and equally exasperated shrugs from others. It’s not a silly question, given its importance to us.
The Answer to an Age Old Question
There is a fundamental set of reasons why men don’t “get” women. These points below will explain a few of them and show you how to use them to your advantage in attracting beautiful women.
As I detail in other articles, humour is a powerful tool for conveying personality. Humour brings a woman in so she can experience the other side of you. It is the advertising headline to get her to pay attention.
A Strong Reality
A woman wants a strong reality: an often times unspoken truth is that a woman needs a strong set of values and ideas that give her something to buy into. I hate to burst aspiring Seductive Artist’s bubble (who am I kidding? I love it!) But appearance, while important, will only keep her interested until she finds the bigger, better, deal or discovers that you have the personality of a slab of concrete.
When you are “about something” as a man, when you a set of values she can subscribe to, it gives her mind something to grab onto. You transform from, say, a night security guard at the zoo to a passionate philosopher who spends his nights constructing theories while keep tigers from escaping and eating people, in the case of one successful friend of mine.
It’s not hard to do this. Simply have a real, unwavering point of view. This doesn’t mean be rigid or closed minded. Be open to other’s opinions and adapt with what works for you.
Connection \ Decency
There are two ways to hyper charge your interactions with women. One is completely obvious when you think of it and the other is somewhat hidden.
Decency: The hidden “power tool” is unspoken and subtle decency. You can use humour and play with her all you want, but you can also open doors for her, lead her somewhere with your hand on the small of her back and pull out her chair for her. Without purposefully drawing attention to it, you are in her mind, “treating her well”. This makes a woman feel more feminine and she will open herself more willingly to you.
Opening doors, etc – should be used sparingly and generally only after she has qualified herself to you and you have accepted her into your world.
Connection: Once humour and a strong frame are being established, once she has earned it by qualifying herself to you, it is critical to establish a connection. This is the place where she is beginning to feel that rush of connecting and being attracted to a new and exciting man. It is what will hook her on you.
Before anyone responds with “Women want six pack abs! Money! Status!” I want you to understand what you convey when you incorporate these elements into your social interactions.
Humour = Confidence and fun
Connection = Intimacy. Someone of value is genuinely interested in them.
Decency = She knows she will be cared for and that you are quality person.
All of these put together create an alluring and sexual spin on things for a woman.